Obviously not rushing anywhere today...

Yesterday was good until I headed to the home. I left work at 3:45 p.m. and had the charge to go by Starbucks and pick up two small coffees for sister #3. I really hate Starbucks and the people in it and what it represents about people today. With all the issues of the day and they are thinking about frappacinos (sp?) and other conspicuous consumption.

Then at "the home", mother was doing very well. Steroids seem to be the wonder drug of this trip back to "the home". Sister #3 did warn me that this is working for us now, but might lead to depression when they wean her off them in a week or so. Add to that that sister #1 and 3 are leaving tomorrow. I have to make it clear that life at "the home" is going to change (8 a.m. to 6 p.m. coverage between my father or my sister)as of Monday. Went back to my parents' house for a minute after we left "the home", but I was happy to head home.

I got a great desk organizer from sister #5 for my birthday and I set up my desk and looked for the cassette tape for the reunion next weekend. Couldn't find it. I know I have seen it. I will keep looking this weekend. Also want to get church in if I can this weekend.

Hard thoughts on my way home last night. It is interesting to look at the lack of connection I feel for my parents. Not in a negative feeling way, but I just don't put any real emotional connection to them in the way I see my other siblings have - and the fact that I do not feel that as a loss item. I also wonder how that connection "disability" might translate to my son. I wonder what he feels toward me and his dad. I also think that my disdain for getting old and medical "wonders" that allow people to live too long - those thoughts get in my way with all that is going on. Our world's "smartness" has created demographic and financial crisis items that will impact at least one more generation if not longer. You can imagine my mood by the time I got home. Glad I had my new desk organizer and looking for that tape to distract me.

No work this a.m. Will go in tomorrow a.m. or tonight depending on "the home" situation. Family Weekend events still going on at school this morning so too many people will be around. Weekend time at work is good because I can be alone.

Not a comfortable day today.

Have a good Saturday.