What a Saturday! I had a few lessons to learn and "the stars" thought, let's take care of all of them on Saturday. With all that is going on in my life I had become a bit off track as far as honesty with myself and others and living in reality rather than a delusional (living with "a fixed false belief that is resistant to reason or confrontation with actual fact") world. From juggling my work situation - actual job versus potential; my lottery ticket buying Wednesday; my wavering from the truth and nothing but the truth...I was wandering and could not bring myself back. What did bring me back was the flashing lights in my rear view window yesterday and the sermon of the beach town priest at church.
I spent so many years living fully in a non-reality based world that I did not even feel it coming over me on Saturday. But I began hearing things come out of my mouth that had no basis in fact...but I just kept moving along. I went into the parents and did my wash and had lunch, then I was off to the beach. I had put it out there that I was going to my since 4 yr old friend's beach house, but I knew I was not going to do that. I went to Hamonnasset and took a long walk and thought I was coming around - did not set up my chair or put my bathing suit on, just walked. Then at 4 I headed to our old family beach town to get an ice cream cone and go to church. But I guess I was still not "back where I was supposed to be", so I went to Hallmark and was going to have a "healthy" cone rather than my usual Chocolate Almond Chip, but the watermelon sherbet was not hard enough to have in a cone, so I went back to my regular. Then I had decided that I was going to take a more direct route from the ice cream place to church so I passed my usual turn and the next thing I know - flashing lights in my rear view mirror. And when the policeman came over to ask me if I knew what I was pulling me over, I said no...but the fact was that as soon as I saw the lights, I put my seat belt on - something I never do. So I double the non-truth telling by saying no to "do you know why you were pulled over" and yes to "do you usually wear your seat belt"...How someone could be a policeman is beyond me. Knowing that their presence on the highway makes people crazy (or is it just me that feels this way?). So he took all my information and handed me my $37 no points ticket for seat belt violation. Then I went on to church, having a running conversation with myself as to "why did I take that different route", why didn't I go to my friend's house and this would have never happened", "why didn't I do plan B and go for ice cream after church", "why didn't I do plan C and take a beach walk on our old beach" - I had tons of plans, but the only plan I stuck with was the one that put me on the wrong side of the law! Then I got to church and here is a bit from the readings...my thought is "to be trained by it" and be "fruitful".
Brothers and sisters,
You have forgotten the exhortation addressed to you as children:
“My son, do not disdain the discipline of the Lord
or lose heart when reproved by him;
for whom the Lord loves, he disciplines;
he scourges every son he acknowledges.”
Endure your trials as “discipline”;
God treats you as sons.
For what “son” is there whom his father does not discipline?
At the time,
all discipline seems a cause not for joy but for pain,
yet later it brings the peaceful fruit of righteousness
to those who are trained by it.
So strengthen your drooping hands and your weak knees.
Make straight paths for your feet,
that what is lame may not be disjointed but healed.
I think I got the picture by the end of the day...I will try to keep on the straight and narrow today, tomorrow, etc.
After church, I got back on the highway - with my seat belt on...and got back to town in time to take a swim at the town pool. A very good thing. Any cooling of my ocean side walk had been taken away by my run in with the law. So I was glad to jump in and soak my head for awhile. Then in my bathing suit, soaking wet hair and my beach cover up and flip flops on I headed to Kohl's to return some pants that my cousin had bought for my mother that did not fit. So what I had hoped (in my outfit) that I could do it at the first register I came to, became a walk through the store, up the escalator to the customer service desk so I could get it credited to her credit card. With mission accomplished, I headed to Shaw's to pick up the only food item I need for this week - bananas - and then I headed home. With my energy level still up, I cleaned house.
Sister #4 called me during my cleaning process to talk about her renovation project, our cousin's new home purchase, the end of her yacht club managing job wrapping up as she heads back to her teaching job in a week or so. After that I watched a few minutes of Rudy Giuliani's talk on CSPAN. Then at 11 p.m., I called it a day.
Slept "late" today - 7 a.m. - no plan for today and that is the truth. In a way I am hoping for rain so I will start reading my Sept Book Club book. Should be a good week ahead. Lots going on. Let me go forward with the thought: "So strengthen your drooping hands and your weak knees. Make straight paths for your feet,that what is lame may not be disjointed but healed". But my "stars" for the week make me a bit nervous...
August 26, 2007 -- Sometimes it is hard to be subtle, especially when confronted by people who are so straightforward (some might say stupid) in their ways that only words of three syllables or less seem to get through to them. One such person will have to be dealt with this week. Say what you like. Insinuate what you like. Chances are they won't know that you are having a laugh at their expense.
Have a good week (and keep me in your thoughts and/or prayers).
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